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Intimacy – the search for love

Intimacy – the search for love

As humans we all have our moments and as each a different person, hence different moments. Unfortunately this tends to affect our lives and others correlated too, most especially in relationships.

Sometimes it appears that one’s relationship with a partner is slowly becoming stale and monotonous and we fear for what we worked so hard for, or prayed so hard to keep our loving relationships. Sometimes most people both guys and ladies are left feeling insecure and unsure of themselves when their partners seem bored or uninterested in them to please them sexually.

Dear Reader if you are one of such kind people, then I have news for you. Sex does not measure intimacy. Anybody can engage in sex even animals do whenever the fancy takes them! What is missing from these relations is intimacy, love which is unequivocally committed for all times. Sex by itself does not connote affection love or, even appreciation. It is simply one of the actions that’s part of life’s cycle.

What you really need Reader, is intimacy intersected with sex. This can turn into the most powerful of human experiences. You can have absolute love without sex but you cannot have absolute sex without love. Sometimes it’s more pleasurable and satisfying to just cuddle up in bed and watch a movie rather than sweating the night away. Having a partner that can turn your world upside down with mind-blowing sex would get you nowhere in the long run, as one who aspires you to be better, is by your side in times of sickness and health, through thick and thin. I’d rather have that thank you very much! It is unfortunate that sometimes in the mad rush of passion most people don’t really think about what it’s going to be like in the future.

Sometimes one gets fed up from too much sex and just wants to chill out and relax. No human can be a sex machine on a 24 hour demand! That’s impossible! It is interesting to know that most guys complain that most women in Sierra Leone don’t even know the first thing about intimacy. “All they know how to do is take off their clothes and basic foreplay, they don’t even know how to satisfy a man sexually”, one guy grumbled to me in a brief research. So it appears that most people are not knowledgeable in the field of intimacy but I believe that to get to such an awesome level one has to be connected to a partner hence a healthy mind and a healthy relationship. You can have so much fun with your spouse and although sex would play an important role in your relationship it will not define it.

Intimacy is what connects you to your partner on deeper emotional psychological and physical levels that will strengthen and solidify your relationship. I personally cannot have sex without a feeling of intimacy being present. Call me old-fashioned Reader but I am a very passionate person that respects one and all but most especially myself. You may say that respect has nothing to do with sex but I assure you it does. I would never want to be in a position where I do a great karma sutra session at night and in the morning I can’t look myself in the mirror. I don’t worry about lack of sex I worry about lack of intimacy. Intimacy is what makes sex worth it if you know what I mean!

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